Oh how the times have changed
by IndigoQueen
Summary: Set after the fight between Gemma and Clay in season 4. Just a few of Gemma's morning after thoughts, could expand not sure yet, please read and review xo


**_Just some thing random I felt like doing, hope you enjoy, please read and review xo _**

She stood in front of the bathroom mirror trying to cover as best she could the bruises her love had left her with, the beating had been bad and there wasn't much that could be concealed. She went over the previous nights events as she lifted a shaky hand to draw thick, dark lines upon her eyelid with her favourite eye pencil.

She'd never been afraid of her husband before. She knew he was a monster, violent by nature but he had a softer side to him, the one he reserved only for her. Gemma had always been the one person that person he never lied to, never hid from, she had made him trust her over the years, her strong yet gentle, caring hands calming the oversized grizzly bear. No matter how many had told her he was a beast her loving eyes had always seen him as a King, his intimidating demeanour only serving as a deterrent for things that go bump in the night. He had always been her protector, though that's not to say this had never happened before, it had. It was part of this lifestyle, different rules applied and sometimes when things got to be too much on both fronts, emotions would be running high and hands would be raised, Gemma took it in stride, she wasn't the type to dwell on shit

This was different though, in the past he had hit her once maybe twice before comin to his senses and when he did he'd take her hands in his, looking into her eyes so that she could see the remorse then she would touch her forehead to his in a silent show of forgiveness. They weren't much for words or apologise...they could have entire conversations with the smallest of actions..the way he kissed her fingers, that was his apology, the half smile she gave him was her show of forgiveness, when he pushed her hair out of her eyes he meant, I love you and her soft lips against his...that was forever

Last nights brawl was something else entirely, it had been comin for a while, all the secrets and lies building up, him killing Piney then tryin to get rid of the mother of her grandkids, he'd crossed almost every line there was and she had no doubt he'd cross them all if he had to. He used to be the thing that protected her and now she was walkin into their house with a gun to protect herself from him. She wasn't sure if she could really shoot him, she knew he didn't think she would but if it came down to it Gemma asked herself if she really had the balls to pull the trigger

According to this asshole he wouldn't be the first husband she killed, she was shocked when he tried to dump that on her especial when he knew she was aware of the real reason he killed JT, it wasn't because of her, she never asked him to do that and though she may have given her blessing he didn't do it for her, he did it for his guns, supportin his income just as he was now .

He walked towards her a little to fast and knowing what was to come she panicked, Gemma didn't know who was more shocked by the shot she fired a few inches away from his head, her or Clay but after that there was no where to go but down She fought back as best she could, punching, scratching, trying to put as much distance between them as she could. Gemma made a run for the door but was intercepted by Clay, he threw her on to the kitchen floor, hitting her with his full strength instead of pulling back like he'd always done in the past. He didn't stop at two either, he kept hittin her until she was out and when she woke up he was gone. He had beat her half to death then left her bleedin on the floor like some dog

She let out a shaky breath before applying her lipstick

There was part of her that still wanted to go to him, to work it out and go back to being what they once were...she hated that part of herself, the weak part that loved him too much to admit the truth, whether or not she loved him wasn't important though, she did, she always would but it didn't change nothin and love don't mean shit right now as far as she's concerned. She let out a few deep breaths to try and centre herself before admitting to herself the same thing shed told Unser last night, the same thing shed been trying to tell herself all morning

"He can't be saved you stupid bitch...time to stop trying"

**_TBC..?_**


End file.
